Post by Scott Simpson on May 28, 2013 12:29:21 GMT -5
The scene opens up with Fergus Callaghan and his best friend Monty Scott standing in a nightclub. Both men are standing near a dimly lit bar, music is thumping and rights are flashing. Both men do not look happy at all. Fergus is wearing a green suit jacket and green pants with an orange tie and Monty Scott is wearing a navy blue suit jacket and pants with a red tie
Fergus Callaghan: Remind me again why we are here?
Monty Scott: Because I believe I came up with the great idea of coming to a club and paying for severely overpriced drinks and getting rejected by every chick in the place.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah you are right, it was your stupid ass who came up with that plan. I would have rejected your stupid ass plan had it not been my sisters birthday. You know people like us don't really belong here Monty, however people like her who grew up in California fit into nightclubs perfectly.
Monty Scott: How old is she now?
Fergus Callaghan: Twenty-One. She really is my sister though. At first when I met her with the exception of having the same hair color as my mother I wouldn't have believed that she was my sister. She is nothing like me or my dad, but when I watch her drink I realize that we really are related.
Monty Scott: Are you still on your first drink?
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah, every time I go back to get another one Katie and her friends come over asking me to buy them and then I completely forget to get one for myself.
Monty Scott: This is kind of pathetic on your part Fergus, you are completely at the mercy of your sister and her friends. You are whipped by your sister and her friends who you have no freaking shot with.
Fergus Callaghan: Why don't I have a shot with any of her friends?
Monty Scott: Well it's really quite simple Fergie, how old is her oldest friends?
Fergus Callaghan: I don't know, twenty-two or twenty three.
Monty Scott: Right, and how old are you?
Fergus Callaghan: Twenty-seven.
Monty Scott: Exactly, you kind of look like that creepy guy from Dazed and Confused.
Fergus Callaghan: The "You know what the best part about high school girls is." guy?
Monty Scott: Exactly, you look like that kind of creepy guy that ends up with you getting a five digit phone number, a kick in the nuts and a tazer in the neck.
Fergus Callaghan: That's a really good point. I don't think I need to get kicked in the balls anymore by strange women.
Monty Scott: Exactly, plus you are already pretty much a shoe in for the "Rejection Hall of Fame." You made getting rejected by woman an art form.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah but you are only able to say that because you happened to get lucky one night and now are getting married to her. I really don't think it's going to work out for you two however.
Monty Scott: Why is that?
Fergus Callaghan: Wait you mean you don't already know what I'm going to tell you?
Monty Scott: I guess not.
Fergus Callaghan: She doesn't like baseball man.
Monty Scott: SHE DOESN'T LIKE WHAT?
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah, she was over at the gym earlier this week and was talking to Katie about how much she dislikes not only baseball but pretty much all sports in general.
Monty Scott: That's freaking UN-American. How can someone who was born and raised in the greatest city in America not like sports. It's a God damn travesty I tell you and I for one will not stand for this shit.
Fergus Callaghan: Well she is here with my sister, you can settle this once and for all. She is standing over by my sister, you should go talk to her before she gets too drunk and ends up having sex with you and getting pregnant and you end up stuck with one who will spend the rest of their natural born life resenting you and your love of sports.
Monty Scott: Should I really do this?
Fergus Callaghan: Yes, and send my sister over, I need to talk to her.
Monty walks away from Fergus and Katie walks over to Fergus
Katie Callaghan: What's up brother?
Fergus Callaghan: Nothing much, are you and your friends going to need a ride home tonight?
Katie Callaghan: Monty already told us that you were bring us home.
Fergus Callaghan: Go figure, that jackass never tells me anything. I guess I better quit drinking now so I can get you guys home safely tonight.
Fergus looks over and sees Monty getting slapped down by a woman and Monty holding his face walks back over to where Fergus and Katie are standing.
Fergus Callaghan: How did that go?
Monty Scott: Better than I had hoped. We are through and she is going to hook up with a male model who also hates sports and I only walked away with broken pride and slap across the face. Now I'm rid of someone who hates sports and with only minor face discomfort.
Fergus Callaghan: That's not too bad at all, here I'll be nice and get you a drink to help ease the pain.
Monty Scott: Thank you, that would be really nice.
Fergus walks over to the bar and orders up a beer for Monty, Fergus walks back to where he had left Monty and Katie just a few moment before and they are no longer there. Fergus walks over to the crowd of Katie's friends.
Fergus Callaghan: Do any of you know where my friend Monty and Katie went?
Friend: I think I heard her say something about Monty taking her home now.
Fergus Callaghan: Oh okay...wait a minute, NOT AGAIN!
Friend: What happened, is he a rapist or something?
Fergus Callaghan: No, he is a friend of mine but I know that he is going to take my sister to pound town again.
Friend: Oh, that's really gross, that guy is like a hundred years old and looks to be going bald.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah I know but my sister will sleep with anyone and anything once she gets enough alcohol in her system.
Friend: You're all cute when you get mad.
Fergus Callaghan: Uh...thanks I guess.
Friend: I just live around the block do you think you could walk me home?
Fergus Callaghan: Sure, I could do that I guess. Just let me finish this drink.
Friend: Just find me near the entrance, I have to go grab my jacket.
Fergus Callaghan: Okay, I'll see you in a minute.
Fergus looks down at his pint
Fergus Callaghan: Bottoms up ol' chap.
Fergus chugs the bear and sets the empty glass on the table and walks towards the entrance as the scene fades to green with a white four leaf clover
Welcome to CPW Mr. Fergus Callaghan, where you will be teamed up with one of the greatest wrestlers in the history of wrestling and you will be facing two members of the all special ed team. Man I don't really know where Mr. Reagan found some of these guys but he must have really been scratching the bottom of the barrel to find these guys.
He found a guy who's name is Justice Hawx and the worst part is that he can't even spell Hawks right. I guess no one bought his parents or maybe Justice himself some hooked on phonics. Hate to break it to you jackass but spelling your name with an x in it hasn't been cool since 1995.
If I was willing to bet, Justice Hawx isn't your actual name and it was something you created while in the middle of a serious meth session because you know no one would take you serious in the business with a name like Jim Bob Henderson. Why you think that calling yourself Justice Hawx would get you taken seriously is beyond me.
And than there is Cyrus the virus who appears to be the mysterious hipster that professional wrestling never wanted. Shooting videos outside the capital building with a grainy black and white camera phone is the sure fire way to get you dropped into Hipsterville.
I guess I should give you credit at first when I saw you standing outside the capital building I thought you were going to go all Nicolas Cage and were actually going to steal the declaration of independence. I know that Adam Knite and I are great Americans we weren't going to let that stand and were going to have to beat your ass down to get it back.
I guess I don't really see where you get that being Irish gives me some sort of entitlement but you are dead wrong Cyrus, I was born in Dublin back in the 80's and when my dad could no longer find work back home were immigrated to the greatest country on earth with nothing more than a few hundred dollars in which to try and start a new life. I have had to work for everything that I have ever gotten in my life and I like my father before me and his father before him are proud of our work ethic and proud to be Irish. If that makes us bad people than I don't want to be right and I look forward to with the help of Adam Knite, kicking your ass across the ring and showing you just how tough of an Irish bastard I am.
As for you declaration of Darkness, bring it on because I've never heard that one before. Hell in another company I used to work for before it folded there was another man saying the same God damn thing and he was twice and big and twice as scary as you are and guess what the end result was. It was the same result you will be facing this week and that is defeat.
I'll focus my final thoughts on Justice again because I completely forgot about how reckless and edgy and badass you are and how you got blackballed from wrestling. Yeah you sound like you are trying to be like my friend Markus Reeves who has been that way since probably before you were born Justice. You may have been blackballed by a few feds for being dangerous but fucking call me when you get banned from entire countries because of stuff that legally happened in the wrestling ring. If you really want to test out how dangerous you are maybe you should step up to the play and fuck with the biggest badass in CPW next week since you wont have to worry about this tournament after this week since you will go out and let the team down allowing Adam or myself to pick up the win against you.
You talked about after you win the championship having the target on your back, well the way I look at it since you and Cyrus are currently the object between me and the World Championship you two are the one's with big red targets on your back and you are the only thing that matters right now. I'll see you Wednesday night punks
Fergus Callaghan: Remind me again why we are here?
Monty Scott: Because I believe I came up with the great idea of coming to a club and paying for severely overpriced drinks and getting rejected by every chick in the place.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah you are right, it was your stupid ass who came up with that plan. I would have rejected your stupid ass plan had it not been my sisters birthday. You know people like us don't really belong here Monty, however people like her who grew up in California fit into nightclubs perfectly.
Monty Scott: How old is she now?
Fergus Callaghan: Twenty-One. She really is my sister though. At first when I met her with the exception of having the same hair color as my mother I wouldn't have believed that she was my sister. She is nothing like me or my dad, but when I watch her drink I realize that we really are related.
Monty Scott: Are you still on your first drink?
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah, every time I go back to get another one Katie and her friends come over asking me to buy them and then I completely forget to get one for myself.
Monty Scott: This is kind of pathetic on your part Fergus, you are completely at the mercy of your sister and her friends. You are whipped by your sister and her friends who you have no freaking shot with.
Fergus Callaghan: Why don't I have a shot with any of her friends?
Monty Scott: Well it's really quite simple Fergie, how old is her oldest friends?
Fergus Callaghan: I don't know, twenty-two or twenty three.
Monty Scott: Right, and how old are you?
Fergus Callaghan: Twenty-seven.
Monty Scott: Exactly, you kind of look like that creepy guy from Dazed and Confused.
Fergus Callaghan: The "You know what the best part about high school girls is." guy?
Monty Scott: Exactly, you look like that kind of creepy guy that ends up with you getting a five digit phone number, a kick in the nuts and a tazer in the neck.
Fergus Callaghan: That's a really good point. I don't think I need to get kicked in the balls anymore by strange women.
Monty Scott: Exactly, plus you are already pretty much a shoe in for the "Rejection Hall of Fame." You made getting rejected by woman an art form.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah but you are only able to say that because you happened to get lucky one night and now are getting married to her. I really don't think it's going to work out for you two however.
Monty Scott: Why is that?
Fergus Callaghan: Wait you mean you don't already know what I'm going to tell you?
Monty Scott: I guess not.
Fergus Callaghan: She doesn't like baseball man.
Monty Scott: SHE DOESN'T LIKE WHAT?
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah, she was over at the gym earlier this week and was talking to Katie about how much she dislikes not only baseball but pretty much all sports in general.
Monty Scott: That's freaking UN-American. How can someone who was born and raised in the greatest city in America not like sports. It's a God damn travesty I tell you and I for one will not stand for this shit.
Fergus Callaghan: Well she is here with my sister, you can settle this once and for all. She is standing over by my sister, you should go talk to her before she gets too drunk and ends up having sex with you and getting pregnant and you end up stuck with one who will spend the rest of their natural born life resenting you and your love of sports.
Monty Scott: Should I really do this?
Fergus Callaghan: Yes, and send my sister over, I need to talk to her.
Monty walks away from Fergus and Katie walks over to Fergus
Katie Callaghan: What's up brother?
Fergus Callaghan: Nothing much, are you and your friends going to need a ride home tonight?
Katie Callaghan: Monty already told us that you were bring us home.
Fergus Callaghan: Go figure, that jackass never tells me anything. I guess I better quit drinking now so I can get you guys home safely tonight.
Fergus looks over and sees Monty getting slapped down by a woman and Monty holding his face walks back over to where Fergus and Katie are standing.
Fergus Callaghan: How did that go?
Monty Scott: Better than I had hoped. We are through and she is going to hook up with a male model who also hates sports and I only walked away with broken pride and slap across the face. Now I'm rid of someone who hates sports and with only minor face discomfort.
Fergus Callaghan: That's not too bad at all, here I'll be nice and get you a drink to help ease the pain.
Monty Scott: Thank you, that would be really nice.
Fergus walks over to the bar and orders up a beer for Monty, Fergus walks back to where he had left Monty and Katie just a few moment before and they are no longer there. Fergus walks over to the crowd of Katie's friends.
Fergus Callaghan: Do any of you know where my friend Monty and Katie went?
Friend: I think I heard her say something about Monty taking her home now.
Fergus Callaghan: Oh okay...wait a minute, NOT AGAIN!
Friend: What happened, is he a rapist or something?
Fergus Callaghan: No, he is a friend of mine but I know that he is going to take my sister to pound town again.
Friend: Oh, that's really gross, that guy is like a hundred years old and looks to be going bald.
Fergus Callaghan: Yeah I know but my sister will sleep with anyone and anything once she gets enough alcohol in her system.
Friend: You're all cute when you get mad.
Fergus Callaghan: Uh...thanks I guess.
Friend: I just live around the block do you think you could walk me home?
Fergus Callaghan: Sure, I could do that I guess. Just let me finish this drink.
Friend: Just find me near the entrance, I have to go grab my jacket.
Fergus Callaghan: Okay, I'll see you in a minute.
Fergus looks down at his pint
Fergus Callaghan: Bottoms up ol' chap.
Fergus chugs the bear and sets the empty glass on the table and walks towards the entrance as the scene fades to green with a white four leaf clover
Welcome to CPW Mr. Fergus Callaghan, where you will be teamed up with one of the greatest wrestlers in the history of wrestling and you will be facing two members of the all special ed team. Man I don't really know where Mr. Reagan found some of these guys but he must have really been scratching the bottom of the barrel to find these guys.
He found a guy who's name is Justice Hawx and the worst part is that he can't even spell Hawks right. I guess no one bought his parents or maybe Justice himself some hooked on phonics. Hate to break it to you jackass but spelling your name with an x in it hasn't been cool since 1995.
If I was willing to bet, Justice Hawx isn't your actual name and it was something you created while in the middle of a serious meth session because you know no one would take you serious in the business with a name like Jim Bob Henderson. Why you think that calling yourself Justice Hawx would get you taken seriously is beyond me.
And than there is Cyrus the virus who appears to be the mysterious hipster that professional wrestling never wanted. Shooting videos outside the capital building with a grainy black and white camera phone is the sure fire way to get you dropped into Hipsterville.
I guess I should give you credit at first when I saw you standing outside the capital building I thought you were going to go all Nicolas Cage and were actually going to steal the declaration of independence. I know that Adam Knite and I are great Americans we weren't going to let that stand and were going to have to beat your ass down to get it back.
I guess I don't really see where you get that being Irish gives me some sort of entitlement but you are dead wrong Cyrus, I was born in Dublin back in the 80's and when my dad could no longer find work back home were immigrated to the greatest country on earth with nothing more than a few hundred dollars in which to try and start a new life. I have had to work for everything that I have ever gotten in my life and I like my father before me and his father before him are proud of our work ethic and proud to be Irish. If that makes us bad people than I don't want to be right and I look forward to with the help of Adam Knite, kicking your ass across the ring and showing you just how tough of an Irish bastard I am.
As for you declaration of Darkness, bring it on because I've never heard that one before. Hell in another company I used to work for before it folded there was another man saying the same God damn thing and he was twice and big and twice as scary as you are and guess what the end result was. It was the same result you will be facing this week and that is defeat.
I'll focus my final thoughts on Justice again because I completely forgot about how reckless and edgy and badass you are and how you got blackballed from wrestling. Yeah you sound like you are trying to be like my friend Markus Reeves who has been that way since probably before you were born Justice. You may have been blackballed by a few feds for being dangerous but fucking call me when you get banned from entire countries because of stuff that legally happened in the wrestling ring. If you really want to test out how dangerous you are maybe you should step up to the play and fuck with the biggest badass in CPW next week since you wont have to worry about this tournament after this week since you will go out and let the team down allowing Adam or myself to pick up the win against you.
You talked about after you win the championship having the target on your back, well the way I look at it since you and Cyrus are currently the object between me and the World Championship you two are the one's with big red targets on your back and you are the only thing that matters right now. I'll see you Wednesday night punks