Post by Scott Simpson on Jun 11, 2013 19:33:41 GMT -5
Who the hell was I supposed to give you?
Was I supposed to give you Cyrus Grey or Justice Hawx, two men we dispatched of so easily two weeks ago?
Was I supposed to give you Kevin Allen or Craig Jacob who we finished off without breaking a sweat last week?
Nope I decided to give you the best person on the roster that isn't you, me, or Davey Ortega since you decided to hand me that fossil for my match.
Nope I decided to give you Josh Stevens who I have watched a little bit and you know what once you get past the fact that he fucks bears and swims in rivers made of maple syrup you will realize that this guy has a future in the business.
Adam, you should probably not take Josh Stevens for granted because if you are willing to take him for granted than maybe you are going to be willing to look past me at the pay per view and if you do that you will be making a grave mistake. Hell if you do decide to take me for granted you might as well just lay down and give me the win instead of me fucking you up in front of your wife and kid and sister.
I'm really sorry for picking Stevens actually, you know if I could I would have picked someone better for you. Someone like Ricky Johnson but we all know he is retired, maybe Joe Everyman but he is probably off in crazyland racking up loses by the truck load. Oh wait if you really wanted a challenge I could have maybe found a little bit of cash and gone out and gotten a real badass like Lex Sense to soften you up a bit.
Whatever you say about me finding a cream puff to face you you go out and dig up Davey Ortega.
Where the fuck did you dig up this fossil from? Seriously this guy has so many miles on him that if he were a car I could get rid of him for fifty bucks and he would go straight to the car crusher.
In fact if I remember correctly the last time I saw Mr. Ortega he was tagging in New Championship Wrestling teaming up with Joe Everyman and was for the lack of a better term getting carried by Joe to the tag team titles before in typical Davey Ortega fashion falls of the face of the Earth.
This is the man you decided to have face me before our epic clash next week. You could have seriously gotten anyone else on Earth and it would have been more of a challenge and you know on person comes to mind right now who is even on the roster but you probably forgot about him because he hasn't appeared on a show yet. That is right Adam, you should have gotten Markus Reeves to face me, at least I know that if I picked up the win on him that he would still give me a whoopin'.
Nope instead of picking someone scary you picked Ortega who will probably come to the ring using either a walker or a rascal scooter and I will have to make a moral discision. I either take it easy on the senior citizen and beat him a little compassion or I put him down with malice like an old rabid dog.
Adam, I know you and Ortega go back a long ways and you know that maybe five years ago Ortega would be a challenge to me but right now I'm faster, stronger and smarter than he is plus I have actually been wrestling matches instead of signing overpriced autographs in a high school gymnasium trying to make enough money to pay his two month past due rent. Maybe I then I would be shaking in my green and black boots but instead I'm going to use this match this week as a warm up for you. I'll make you wish you had picked someone who might actually have a chance of hurting me or maybe someone who isn't going to break his fucking hip on the first suplex he takes.
It's time for someone to finally dethrone you and take the thrown as the rightful king of CPW. I'll be the quite assassin in the shadows who when you least expect slits your throat from behind and watches you slowly bleed out. When the deed has been done I will take my spot on the throne and Kelly will throw herself at me and I'll look into her eyes and give her eyes and I'll say the words that she has been longing to hear for her entire life.
Hail to the king, baby.
Was I supposed to give you Cyrus Grey or Justice Hawx, two men we dispatched of so easily two weeks ago?
Was I supposed to give you Kevin Allen or Craig Jacob who we finished off without breaking a sweat last week?
Nope I decided to give you the best person on the roster that isn't you, me, or Davey Ortega since you decided to hand me that fossil for my match.
Nope I decided to give you Josh Stevens who I have watched a little bit and you know what once you get past the fact that he fucks bears and swims in rivers made of maple syrup you will realize that this guy has a future in the business.
Adam, you should probably not take Josh Stevens for granted because if you are willing to take him for granted than maybe you are going to be willing to look past me at the pay per view and if you do that you will be making a grave mistake. Hell if you do decide to take me for granted you might as well just lay down and give me the win instead of me fucking you up in front of your wife and kid and sister.
I'm really sorry for picking Stevens actually, you know if I could I would have picked someone better for you. Someone like Ricky Johnson but we all know he is retired, maybe Joe Everyman but he is probably off in crazyland racking up loses by the truck load. Oh wait if you really wanted a challenge I could have maybe found a little bit of cash and gone out and gotten a real badass like Lex Sense to soften you up a bit.
Whatever you say about me finding a cream puff to face you you go out and dig up Davey Ortega.
Where the fuck did you dig up this fossil from? Seriously this guy has so many miles on him that if he were a car I could get rid of him for fifty bucks and he would go straight to the car crusher.
In fact if I remember correctly the last time I saw Mr. Ortega he was tagging in New Championship Wrestling teaming up with Joe Everyman and was for the lack of a better term getting carried by Joe to the tag team titles before in typical Davey Ortega fashion falls of the face of the Earth.
This is the man you decided to have face me before our epic clash next week. You could have seriously gotten anyone else on Earth and it would have been more of a challenge and you know on person comes to mind right now who is even on the roster but you probably forgot about him because he hasn't appeared on a show yet. That is right Adam, you should have gotten Markus Reeves to face me, at least I know that if I picked up the win on him that he would still give me a whoopin'.
Nope instead of picking someone scary you picked Ortega who will probably come to the ring using either a walker or a rascal scooter and I will have to make a moral discision. I either take it easy on the senior citizen and beat him a little compassion or I put him down with malice like an old rabid dog.
Adam, I know you and Ortega go back a long ways and you know that maybe five years ago Ortega would be a challenge to me but right now I'm faster, stronger and smarter than he is plus I have actually been wrestling matches instead of signing overpriced autographs in a high school gymnasium trying to make enough money to pay his two month past due rent. Maybe I then I would be shaking in my green and black boots but instead I'm going to use this match this week as a warm up for you. I'll make you wish you had picked someone who might actually have a chance of hurting me or maybe someone who isn't going to break his fucking hip on the first suplex he takes.
It's time for someone to finally dethrone you and take the thrown as the rightful king of CPW. I'll be the quite assassin in the shadows who when you least expect slits your throat from behind and watches you slowly bleed out. When the deed has been done I will take my spot on the throne and Kelly will throw herself at me and I'll look into her eyes and give her eyes and I'll say the words that she has been longing to hear for her entire life.
Hail to the king, baby.